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politics My new pledge
by GMFTatsujin
gfd messagesAIM
(Ask and ye shall receive) on Apr 22, 2005 10:39:49 PM

If you were logged in, you could vote for this story!

The constant battle over the American pledge of allegiance -- to God, or not to God -- has me in a tizzy. I expect that others may have the same problem. For your convenience and peace of mind, I have made this handy form as a public service of the Internet. Keep one with you at all sporting events and during news broadcasts.
 
I [pledge allegiance to/enter into social contract with/wave with vigor/burn in protest/think is pretty/like to wear garments which resemble/happened to be born somewhere near] (pick those that apply) the [flag/ideal/law/president/rightful president/iron fist/almighty dollar] of the United States of America.

And to the [Republic/Federated States/South/Oligarchy/Plutocracy/War/Cosmic Farce/Shining Beacon] for which [he/she/it] [stands/rises],

[One/Two/Many/No] [Nation/Kingdom/Empire/City-State/Dystopia/New Jersalem/Great Big Target] [under/over/near/orbiting around/refusing/playing] (state the celestial power of your choice, or circle "none"),

Indivisible [Y/N] (acknowledge that states may reserve the right to secede?), with [liberty/justice/houses/food/game consoles/medical care/cable internet/entertainment] (pick two) for [all/none/me/you/peanuts].

Don't say I never gave you nothin'. ________FuckingDamnit.

[ Comment on this story ]


    I Sir,
    by qasr(qasr [at] qasr [dot] mine [dot)
    gfd messages
    on Apr 22, 2005 10:44:02 PM
    (#18524)
    take offense that this was not translated into my native Klingon!
    [Reply to this comment]
    Pledge
    by bean
    gfd messages
    on Apr 25, 2005 04:03:35 PM
    (#18543)
    I like to wear garments which resemble the iron fist of the United States of America.

    And to the Cosmic Farce for which he rises,

    Many Dystopia refusing none,

    Indivisible, with game consoles and cable internet for you.


    hehe, that was fun.
    [Reply to this comment]
    New salute I will lead in classrooms: gold star
    by nusschen
    gfd messagesICQ
    on May 2, 2005 09:29:13 PM
    (#18569)
    I happened to be born somewhere near the almighty dollar of the United States of America.

    And to the Farce for which it stands,

    One Great Big Target orbiting around a star,

    Divisible, with houses and medical care for none.
    [Reply to this comment]
    It's the pledge.
    by ElChuloPicante
    gfd messages
    on Apr 9, 2006 08:08:39 AM
    (#21617)
    I don't believe in God either, but he's in the pledge, so I include him. Everyone needs to say the damned pledge right and stop whining about it. Too many twisted panties.
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