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work Retard wrangler for hire
by Microsoft Bob
gfd messagesAIMICQ
(spamburrito@gmail.com) on Jan 23, 2003 04:50:02 AM

If you were logged in, you could vote for this story!

No, I didn't hate my job, but now I'm on the prowl for a new one-- Dodging some of the most annoying shit to ever hit in my direction.
 


Okay, so I'm out of work right now. Apparently there wasn't enough work at my old job (job coach for developmentally disabled people, which my friend, upon hearing that, dubbed it Retard Wrangling, and thus it shall always be). I almost had enough money to buy a computer, but not quite. Oh well, time to search for a new job.

In the meantime, I'm getting tired of dealing with my step-dad, and I'm sure the feeling is mutual. He does some dumb stuff (destroying two $500 chairs, which my grandfather gave me), and I'm randomly angry due to, I'm pretty sure hypoglycemia or something. His amazing ability to eat *CONSTANTLY*, then throw away something that I eat astounds me (see here ).

Here are some other things I've been dealing with, more or less for the past 6 months.

"So you're into computers" "yes" "so you know how to program and stuff" "yes" "Well, I'm learning how to program in HTML" "Here's a cookie" "but I can't figure out how to do $whatever." "well, to do $whatever, you use this construct." "well, I've been using frontpage to do it, and I don't see that option" "great. Why are you still talking? If you won't do it the way I suggest, and you're using something that *CAN"T* do it that way, well?"

I'll introduce him to a friend, he'll ask the friend some dumb question, such as
friend: "Yeah, I met Bob through certain other friends, because we're all into $whatever."
step-dad: "so you're into $whatever?"
friend (looking annoyed to me): "yes"

A (very ADD) friend of mine nearly killing him over misusing some SCA equipment, and pawing all over some armor after specifically telling him not to touch.

See here. as an update, this is still happening, on a biweekly basis. I've gotten out of the car and done it three times-- I've yet to have a taker, though I've gotten some very weird looks from the church and elderly homes that I was in front of two of the times.

Every two days (Note the astounding lack of repeating myself in this log-- It'll just depress me to do it 100% like reality-- which usually has three "well, we don't need another line we've already got one" and "why can't I have two dsl lines on one phone line" and usually the odd "what if we just went out and buy a router (to which I answer go the fuck ahead, but it'll cost upwards of 50 dollars and you're such a tight-ass it's never gonna happen)):

"Can we get another one of these (DSL Modem)"
"Not if you want to use it"
"well how much would it cost?"
"Ummm, lets see. the same thing I told you last time. That's 15/mo for the phone line plus 60/mo for the dsl, plus 150 for the modem just because I don't think you understand that is 75 FUCKING DOLLARS A MONTH.
"why will it cost so much"
"because all I have to fucking do is unbury the computer that you shoved about two DECADES worth of paperwork onto for no apparent reason, then moved it while I was away at lunch, singlehandedly fucking up about 4 hours of futzing with the init files to get it to act as a fuckin' router, and making it so it wouldn't boot anymore. As soon as it is set up, I'll never have to hear this shit again, you'll never have to bitch again, and I'll be able to GO ON MY MERRY FUCKING WAY WITHOUT YOU ASKING ME HOW MUCH IT WOULD COST TO GET ANOTHER FUCKING DSL MODEM"

These are all I can think of right now-- I'm too tired to think of more examples. Trust me, there are enough for three or four new GFD's. Rest assured, it's not just my step dad-- but right now he's the one I feel like picking on.

I'm hoping to move out of the area soon. I'm hoping and I'm praying, and I'm looking in as wide a range as possible-- because if this goes on much longer, I might take drastic measures-- Like sell my jeep and live on teh streets in santa cruz, rather than deal with this shit anymore.

I feel much better now. Bed time!
/bob


[ Comment on this story ]


    ADD drones
    by Skewfield(bean makes me fart)
    gfd messagesAIM
    on Jan 23, 2003 05:40:38 AM
    (#4096)
    Wow, people afflicted with this have the most astounding propensity for destroying property mindlessly. You can't ever leave anything you think is important around, lest it a) grow legs b) catch fire c) find a new home in the cylindrical file. I live with a couple of ADDers, and, given that i'm emotionally involved, it's very hard to take. Personally I've always wondered if this is really a "Social Disease" caused by lifestyle changes, as some people suggest, or if it has always occurred throughout history. ATM I cannot think of any historical evidence that points toward the existence of this in times past, but whatever.
    As for solving computer problems for these people, yeah, it's definitely a hard row to hoe. My father is always pestering me about networking the entire house and fixing this one computer, and i've worked up prices and crap about three times now, I just haven't had time to sit down with him and help him buy the crap for it, and I don't particularly feel like putting out for this shit myself, because he has a terrible track record with IOUs. In a way, it's like having the most incompetent qualities of bosses and the most sheerly hatred-inducing qualities of immediate family combined, because 1) they don't listen, and will ask you repeatedly about stuff, and then will turn around and accuse you of being overly didactic. These sessions are often followed up by Familial Unit N coming up to you at a later point in time and proceeding to "inform" you about what you know very well that you told them a relatively short period of time ago, and pretending (believing?) it was all their own idea. My brother is constantly asking me a set of questions which varies from week to week, or so, but generally comprises the same topics, particularly an ISP password he cannot commit to memory. Why can these people never learn to write things down?!?

    Skewfield
    [Reply to this comment]
    Takin' Retards To The Zoo - Dead Milkmen
    by irni(gfd@ctrl-alt-fuckoff.com)
    gfd messagesAIMYahooMSN
    on Jan 23, 2003 11:33:29 AM
    (#4104)
    It's a boring day - I've got nothing to do
    Except to get a load of retards and drive em to the zoo
    Oh oh oh takin' retards to the zoo (x2)
    Load 'em on a bus just for laughs
    Down a winding road stepping on the gas
    Down a winding road just to stay dreaming
    Down a winding road with the retards screaming
    Oh oh oh takin' retards to the zoo (x2)
    One of them blowing a big spit bubble
    Slam on the brakes at the first sign of trouble
    Head on collision bodies everywhere
    Head on collision retards beware
    Oh oh oh takin' retards to the zoo (x2)


    HEHE
    [Reply to this comment]
    ...
    by Gribble
    gfd messages
    on Jan 23, 2003 01:26:50 PM
    (#4115)

    APPLE!

    [Reply to this comment]
      LAWL
      by TheChisa(come@me.bro)
      gfd messages
      on Jan 23, 2003 02:21:11 PM
      (#4120)
      I'm probably the only one who gets this joke.
      [Reply to this comment]  [Parent]
        Yes.
        by Microsoft Bob(spamburrito@gmail.com)
        gfd messagesAIMICQ
        on Jan 23, 2003 02:23:49 PM
        (#4121)
        Yes, you are.
        [Reply to this comment]  [Parent]
        ok
        by BrightShadow(candiebaby0620@yahoo.com)
        gfd messagesYahoo
        on Jan 24, 2003 01:04:00 PM
        (#4249)
        So you want to share with the rest of us what it means?
        [Reply to this comment]  [Parent]
          No, not really.
          by Gribble
          gfd messages
          on Jan 24, 2003 01:32:14 PM
          (#4251)
          It would take a long time to explain.

          Also, it's part of an idea I have that's going to make millions of dollars and then I'll have to leave the country because mobs of angry people will be chasing me with picks and shovels and rakes and axes. If I tell you a: the company i work for now owns it and b: you'll steal it and make millions of dollars and have to leave the country and you won't do it half as well as I would.

          It's directly related to retard wrangling, is all.

          [Reply to this comment]  [Parent]
    Mean but SO FUNNY
    by HappyMonkey
    gfd messages
    on Aug 18, 2003 12:28:55 AM
    (#8510)
    "Retard Wrangling" is so mean and so funny!
    [Reply to this comment]
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